Top Tips for Great Sex with Older Women – And Things to Avoid!

It’s common knowledge many older women desire great sexual encounters with young fit men. And as it’s scientifically proven women over 45 often experience sudden spikes in lust and arousal, perfecting your technique is crucial to ensure she’s deeply satisfied.

Sex is art, and anyone disputing that is in denial. Achieving the most gratifying, sensual intercourse possible is important to maintain cougar dating. She’s likely had many more sexual experiences than you due to age, and will know precisely what she wants.

5 Tips for Great Sex With Older Women

Foreplay is everything

Women are notoriously more sensual and touch orientated than men, meaning foreplay is an unparalleled essential if you want to intensely pleasure her. It’s suggested physical intercourse should only comprise 20% of the entire duration of sexual activity, meaning the remaining 80% should involve foreplay engagement.

Dirty talk, sensuous massages and passionate kissing are all brilliant methods to begin. Oral sex is also a tremendous way of turning her on, guaranteed to set the tone for a big finale.


Even in later life, females enjoy being dominated and commanded during sex. In fact, some women may actively dislike initiating acts, feeling weird if they’re the ones kick starting foreplay. Keep her needs a priority and ensure she feels appreciated. Caress and fondle her, and demonstrate who’s boss as actions get heated.

Be adventurous

If she’s a strictly vanilla sex kind of woman, venturing away from conventional sex isn’t a great plan. But if she’s frisky and enjoys trying new things, expanding your horizons and enjoying alternative styles is a scintillating way of maintaining optimum excitement. Try different positions, vibrators, and even BDSM if she’s game.

Be spontaneous

Sometimes the best sex comes from unplanned, random encounters when you least expect them! Spontaneity and rampant dirty chat is ideal for getting her in the mood quickly. Or alternatively, you can lengthen the process and begin arousing her in the morning ready for when you visit at night. Females generally take much longer than men to become fully aroused and ready, meaning you must establish exactly what she requires to avoid hurting her or taking her by unpleasant surprise in which she’s unresponsive.

What Not to Do in Bed With an Older Woman

Whilst you may see yourself as a sex expert with the best tips in the book, there’s definitely an array of strategies and ideas to avoid at all costs when sleeping with older women. If you utterly fail and she loses fire, it’s incredibly challenging to get her fired up again.

Firstly, don’t choose sex positions you’re inexperienced with. No matter how provocative and seductive she is, no woman wants to be treated like a nasty porn star. Stick with positions you know you’re good at, and if desiring something new be sure to communicate.

Boundaries are equally vital, with many young men inadvertently getting carried away and overexcited – especially if their ultimate fantasy is lying next to them. If you’re keen to introduce toys and even anal sex into the mix, don’t just do it without her permission. There’s nothing worse for older ladies than a cocky young male who thinks he’s a professional. Adhere to her wishes and you can’t go far wrong.

It’s also crucial to remain aware of your current relationship status, especially in the bedroom. If she’s not your official girlfriend, don’t treat her like it! If intimately snuggling afterwards, don’t engage in lovey dovey chat with her if you know she’s not into it. If at any stage you feel confused regarding your situation, there’s no shame in asking.

How to Know if an Older Woman Wants Sex

It’s a hugely outdated stereotype that all cougars desire pure sex with no emotional connection. Some crave meaningful companionships instead, so it’s super detrimental to just assume every sexy older woman you see is responsive to sexual advances.

Accurately reading body language is key. Many confident older females have no qualms being forward and initiating the first stages of sex, but you must interpret situations correctly. If she’s happily caressing and kissing you, slowly progress further and observe her reactions. If positive, it’s likely sex is on her mind.

But with any relationship dilemma, if unsure there’s nothing stopping you from enquiring. To get a straightforward answer with no messing, ask her to bed and see what’s said. Taking matters into your own hands and establishing ground rules early is urgent.

Is it Ethical to Have Sex with Older Women?

Regarding sex and relationships, there’s no concrete rules. Provided both parties are contented, happy and at ease with the scenario, having sexual contact with older women is nothing to be embarrassed of.